TheBDFL.com                         The official internet site of the Big Daddy Football League                               2010

The Bulletin

Week 16

Mayors Pull Monster Upset over Woosiers, 30-23

In the Commissioner’s ill-fated attempt to not “award mediocrity,” that’s exactly what has happened in the BDFL. Not since the Benton Bullets won the Championship in 2008 as the Number Two Seed, has an “upper” seed won the league title. And, the same will be true this year, as the Big Daddy Bowl will feature a #5 seed (Mayors) vs. a #7 seed (Cheetahs). Yawn. The Magic City Mayors punched their ticket to the championship game with a hard fought battle against the top-seeded Woosiers that wasn’t settled until the smoke cleared from a rare, that’s right, rare Tuesday Night NFL game. The Woo Crew could not close the deal this season, and will watch the Big Daddy Bowl – the “Battle for the Grand Daddy” – with the rest of the rank-and-file. As for the Mayors, they’ve declared the rest of the 2010 calendar year as a “city holiday” in Birmingham with daily parades and parties leading up to the big finale this Sunday.

7^th Seeded Cheetahs Advance by Downing Wizards, 17-11

No one has benefited more from the Big Daddy Championship Series bracket system than the Riverchase Cheetahs. All three of the Sin Wagon’s BDFL Titles have come in the post-season tournament era. Now, the felines are primed for an unprecedented run at a fourth championship, and all they will have to do is beat a lowly 5th seed in the Big Daddy Bowl. The Cheetahs had a pretty easy run in the semi-final round, catching the woeful Pasco County Wizards, who could not even manage a dozen points and claim the “Toilet Seat Team of the Weak” in a crunch time situation. The game was so bad that Merlin wouldn’t even talk to the media after it was over. He only released a statement that he was firing his coordinators: Wayne Hall on defense and Neil Calloway on offense. In an unprecedented move, the Cheetahs have joined in with the Mayors in having a holiday week at Sammy’s with parades, parties, and table dances at half price leading right up to kickoff on Sunday.

Dogs Win “Brookside Bowl” over Slovaks, 29-17

The Dogs 16-year losing streak will continue past the 2010 season, but at least Mark’s Mutts are going out with some dignity this season. First of all, they made it into the Big Dance this year, which is a big accomplishment. Then after getting knocked out in the first round, they showed some heart and some desire by crushing the Helena Fighting Slovaks in the loser’s bracket (not to be confused with the Big Mullet Series). Dignity has long gone out the window for ASlo and his PiCap Caravan of EuroTrash Talkers. In fact, the Slovaks could have taken some positives out of the season, were it not for their inability to “keep it down home cuz.” Anyway, the Slovaks lost to the Brookside Dogs… so bragging rights on the banks of the Five Mile Creek – at least between Cardiff and Graysville – goes to the Dogs.

Defending Champs Rally for 19-12 Vict’ry Against Nauts

Living now in the shadow of Bryant-Denny Stadium is starting to pay some benefits for the Capstone Grenadiers. They may have been knocked from title contention last week in humiliating fashion, but they look like they may be able to “finish” with some class and consistency (well as least some consistency). Outside the Championship bracket, the Commissioner dropped the Jugtown Juggernauts in Week 16 by a touchdown. But even the loss couldn’t dampen Allyson’s season. The Nauts made some noise in 2010, before finding consecutive losses when it mattered most. Now, A.E. will begin eying the Pony List and the off-season NFL action in order to return to what surely felt like “rarefied air” to the Juggernauts this season.

Bullets Finally Win Again Topping Blitz, 26-23

“Welcome to the Show that never ends, my friends.” Well, the College Football Season has 33 meaningless bowls, and the BDFL has the Big Mullet Series. They are not meaningless bowls, when you’ve won more than anybody in the hist’ry of college football. Not many people outside of the Bama Nation understand that one. And, not many BDFLers understand the sweet taste of vict’ry for the Benton Bullets. But, when you’ve got the most wins in BDFL history, adding to that amount is no small matter. With that said, the Bullets came-from-behind to top the Blitz in Week 16 and most importantly, avoid a trip to the lowest bowl of all… a place the Blitz will soon be visiting called, “The Toilet Bowl.”

Sleds Slide to the Toilet Bowl by losing to Whiskey Runners 35-18

How can this be? The once powerful PowerSleds (even at points this season) are on a collision course with the Blitz in the 2010 Toilet Bowl to close out the season. The Bulletin doesn’t know which is worse – playing in this game, or losing to the Yankee Owned-and-Operated, North Canton Bootleggers. Either way, the season has been completely “derailed” (and not in a good SideTrack way) for the Mean Machine. Ouch. And, if they lose to the Blitz on Sunday, “ouch-e-wah-wah.”

Sloths (Schedule Maker) Whip Woodies, 41-35

Michael Hewlitt Dismukes beat Jaimie Philip Hand in Round Two of the BDFL Mullet Series – details were unavailable. However, Old Kawliga’s 35-points would have won every other game in the BDFL (BDCS & BMS) in Week 16. The Conspiracy Theory has wings, as the Wooden Warriors were complete flummoxed by the circumstances in 2010 (read: hosed by the schedule-maker and shot-gunned by the bracket artists).

Cats Edge Gamblers, 14-13

So much for the Dixie Mafia controlling the Gulf Coast, they couldn’t even come up with an extra point or two to beat the lowly Western Hills Wildcats. Mild, for most of the season, the James Gang didn’t lay down in the next-to-last weekend of the season, and have a vict’ry over the Gamblers to show for it.