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TheBDFL.com The official internet site of the Big Daddy Football League 2013 |
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Welcome to the Mullet Sometimes it's about losing as the BDFL, not a committee, separates the contenders from the pretenders MEDIA VOID - One team on the “brink of elimination” (from the Big Daddy Championship Series) fell off the cliff in Week 13, and landed in the Mullet Series. The Bulletin is talking ‘bout the Commissioner (the Grenadiers and the Bullets have a Week 14 match-up, where they will – thankfully – throw the record books out). But, before that happens The Bulletin will discuss the events of the previous weekend. The Mineral Springs Grenadiers, with their backs against the wall, were taken down by the Western Hills Wildcats, 31-19. So, old Iron will now set his sights on the Mullet Series, because with a record of 5-8, the Grenadiers are eliminated from the BDCS via the “Bullet Rule.” However, the “James Gang” was in no position to celebrate, after their beloved Vestavia Hills Rebels were knocked out of the ASHAA 6A State Playoffs on Friday Night. |
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The Bulletin originates from underneath a rock in Media Void |
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Woosiers Pushed to the Edge (of elimination) by Gamblers: Tommy T’s Smoke Riders in the Sky put up a whopping 47-points this past Sunday, but that was not good enough to beat the Gulf Coast Gamblers, who scored 52. The agonizing and crushing loss, puts the Woo Crew at a precarious 6-7 on the season, and just one loss away from dropping into the Mullet Series (under the aforementioned “Bullet Rule”). Meanwhile, the Dixie Mafia is “rockin’ & rollin.’ Not only did “The Real Deal” get a Big “W” in Week 14 to improve to 9-4 on the season, they were able to steal a little “bookie” turf away from the Gambino family (even though it was a small section in Blount County, kind of between Trafford and Necter).
Duncanville Dudes Stay Alive in Style: On the Duncanville Dude Ranch near Metro Suburban Dallas, Texas, K.P.’s “armed and dangerous” Armadillos blew out the Brookside Dogs, 43-16. It was an A.W. of epic proportions. The win staves off elimination – at least for another week – for the ‘Dillos. Meanwhile, for the crushed and humiliated Mutts, it puts even more pressure on their Week 14 game, (see 6-7 record, ramifications of the “Bullet Rule”) as they continue to try and end their “18-year-losing streak” in the Big Daddy Football League.
Slovaks 36 – Wooden Warriors 35: Let that headline/subtitle sink in: Oak Mountain Fighting Slovaks 36, Black Creek Wooden Warriors 35. ASlo left Jaimie’s 50th Birthday Party early and worked on his game plan for a whole week, while Jaimie refused to “go ugly early” and stayed (at his own party) until the bitter end, and his BDFL franchise had to suffer the expletive consequences. Would you rather lose to the Slovaks and make the Big Dance, or at least beat the Slovaks and go on to the Mullet Series?
Sleds Shoot Down Bullets: The Benton Bullets have long-since been relegated to the Mullet Series. To add insult to embarrassment, the Fairfield PowerSleds pounded the Blanks, 29-12, this weekend. It was never close. It was never in doubt. With their backs against the wall, the Mean Machine played flawlessly in Week 13 to notch a big win and move to 6-7 on the season. That means Mad Jack’s team is still alive for a spot in the BDCS. All the Sleds need is a win this next weekend to qualify for the Big Dance (their point total is already sufficient).
Sloths Slip Past Mayors: The Sloth Monsters and the Mayors are already making plans for the Big Mullet Series along the Gulf Coast, with their guaranteed losing records. This week in a seemingly meaningless game, the Three Toed Tree Dwellers slipped past the Cronies, 23-11. “Thank goodness for the Bullets, Slovaks, and Wizards,” said Alan in defeat. “Or I’d have the lowest point total in the BDFL.”
Juggernauts Bury Blitz: “We Want the Warriors” said a sign amongst the Jugtown Juggernauts faithful fans, following A.E.’s big vict’ry over the Druid City Blitz. The reference is too the defending BDFL Champion Wooden Warriors. You could say that the ‘Nauts are “feeling it” this season, as they continue to pile up points and wins in 2013. It may be the best season ever for the Bra Burners, who stand at 9-4 on the season, and look to be a “force to be reckoned with” in the upcoming BDCS. As for the Blitz, they may have laid an egg in Week 13, and picked up the “Toilet Seat Team of the Week” award, but at 8-5 on the season, (and a good point total) they look to be a lock for the Big Dance.
Lucky Wizards Win Again: “The undoubted luckiest team” maybe in the hist’ry of the BDFL, continues to win games in amazing, miraculous, fluke-like fashion, this season. Parks’ Pixie Dusters – aka – the Pasco County Wizards have a Point Total that is only better than the Bullets and Slovaks, yet they continue to find ways to win games in what has to be a fantasy atmosphere for Merlin. In Week 13, the Wizards pulled another one out of their hat. They beat the Cheetahs by six, 22-16, on a last-second, photo-finish, Hail Mary, buzzer-beater, red-light, at the wire, fat-lady warming up, fluke-of-the-universe TD with no time remaining. Now, all the Wizards need is loses in the last week of the season by the Armadillos, Dogs, PowerSleds, and Woosiers in order to make the BDCS.
In case you missed it… Pucker Factor Personified: The following 6-7 teams cannot afford a loss in Week 14 (or they will be sent to the Mullet Series): Armadillos, Dogs, PowerSleds, and Woosiers. [Other than Billy Ray Cyrus… who had the best mullet of all time?] |
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