The Bulletin

Week 8: Railroad trains and locomotives

The Bulletin is your source for weekly BDFL game summaries and more.

Here’s The Bulletin for Week Eight 2026: Volume 32, Number 8.

Week 8: Off the Rails:

The 1972 Miami Dolphins are celebrating again. That version of the Dolphins remains the only undefeated team in the hist’ry of the National Football League. Many – if not all – of their remaining, living players, celebrate each season when the last NFL unbeaten team... gets beat. The Minnesota Vikings were the last team to fall from the ranks of the undefeated, as they lost to the Detroit Lions in Week 8 in both the NFL and the Big Daddy Football League. Last week in the BDFL, the Magic City Mayors were the last team driven from the ranks of the unbeaten in the nation’s premiere fantasy football league. The question going into this weekend was: could they possible lose two in a row? On the “other” sideline, stood the “once awful, but resurgent” Fieldstown Bellcows. “Super Dave” finally got his team to play like contenders a few weeks ago, and the heifers have been hot. But, Belrose was chasing the .500 mark, while the Cronies were after perfection until they were “derailed,” last week. Still at 6-1 entering Week 8, the Mayors had the best record in the BDFL. But, the Bellcows proved to be too much for Mayor Arrington on the eve of an election, and Bell Head got the power train vict’ry over the Mayors - locomotive style - 39-18, which also goes down as an A.W.  

Week 8: Trains & Driver 8 Tribute:

The walls are built up stone by stone. The fields divided one by one. And the train conductor says, “Take a break, Driver 8. Driver 8, take a break, we've been on this shift too long.” And the train conductor says, “Take a break, Driver 8. Driver 8, take a break... we can reach our destination.” But we're still a ways away, but it's still a ways away. I saw a treehouse on the outskirts of the farm. The power lines have floaters so the airplanes won't get snagged The bells are ringing through the town again. The children look up, all they hear is sky-blue bells ringing And the train conductor says...Take a break, Driver 8... Driver 8, take a break... We can reach our destination. But we're still a ways away, but it's still a ways away. But we're still a ways away, but it's still a ways away. A way to shield the hated heat. A way to put myself to sleep. A way to shield the hated heat. A way to put myself, my children to sleep. He piloted this song in a plane like that one. She is selling faith on the “Go Tell Crusade.” Locomotive 8, Southern Crescent, hear the bells ring again. The fields of wheat is looking thin. And the train conductor says... Take a break, Driver 8... Driver 8, take a break... We've been on this shift too long. And the train conductor says... Take a break, Driver 8... Driver 8, take a break... We can reach our destination. But we're still a ways away, but it's still a ways away. But we're still a ways away, but it's still a ways away. (R.E.M. circa 1985)  

Choo, Choo, Cheetahs De-rail Gamblers:

The BDFL’s elder statesman likes his rock-n-roll vintage style, but he can also roll with the newer tunes. The Cheetah-Man, Butch Neal, is always looking to chug his way to vict’ry in fantasy football on Sunday afternoons. In Week 8 in the BDFL, the Southside Cheetahs had a challenge in front of them in the form of the formidable Gulf Coast Gamblers. This game started out close. Both teams were more like a freight train than a locomotive, just trying to haul a load that would lead to vict’ry. The Sin Wagon and the Dixie Mafia were locked up in steam-driven, churn, to earn a win. When this “outbound train,” finally pulled into the station, and the final whistle blew, it was almost too close to call, but the Cheetahs that emerged victorious in the cyber world of the BDFL, in overtime, and announced to everyone that they – once again – are serious contenders for the title and the prestigious Grand Daddy Trophy.  

Bullets Chug Past Grenadiers:

In Week Seven, the Benton Bullets fell behind 22-0 after NFL Thursday Night action on their way to losing their 4th straight game. The old Bullerino said, “never again.” So, in Week 8 in the BDFL, the Bullets were ready to go early in the week, and jumped out to a 15-0 lead after the Packers-Panthers game on Thursday Night. After that, the Bullets had to hold on more than loosely to earn a vict’ry over the Mineral Springs Grenadiers. It was not easy. It was close. But, after all the votes... er, points were counted... the Bullets were able to hold onto a 22-20 win over the Commissioner in one of the two “brother bowls” that occur annually in the nation’s premiere fantasy football league. As for the Grenadiers, Iron Hand admits that falling behind so early in the game, and trying to come-back so desperately thru the early Sunday window, the late games, the Sunday night game, and Monday Night Football was just too much for his “little engine that could,” to accomplish. And, ultimately... his team had to face defeat.  

Nauts Derail Sloth Train:

When that lonesome whistle blows... and you’re a long way from home... and the cold wind blows... and the rain howls... and, you’re feelin’ lost... that’s how the Shades Creek Sloth Monsters felt after their Week 8 match-up in the BDFL. Mukes had the misfortune of playing the ‘Nauts on Halloween weekend. There are worse things. There are more frightful things. There are more unpleasant things. But, there’s nothing that can add up to a loss in the BDFL more than playing the ‘Nauts, when they get all hopped-up on sugar from the proverbial Jack-O-Lantern candy jar and come out with Snickers, Twix, and Mars Bars. The Son of Slim lost an early lead. They couldn’t hold on without opposable thumbs against the ‘Nauts. The Three Toed Tree Dwellers just didn’t have enough grip to defeat the Jugtown Juggernauts, but did manage to hold on to the “Toilet Seat Team of the Weak” award.  

“Special” Feeling as Biocats Beat Bandits:

“Midnight Special, Orange Blossom Special, Peace Train, Lane Train, or Crazy Train... the Western Hills Wildcats are just glad to get a special vict’ry,” said Jerry James in the victorious locker room after this game, upon the BioCats win over the Altadena Bandits in Week 8 in the BDFL. Talk about two teams mired in the middle of the BDFL, the poster franchises for fantasy football are the Bandits and the BioCats. With the results from Jerry’s vict’ry over the Bandits, both teams now sit in the middle of the tracks with records right around .500. Not too hard and not too soft are these two teams in 2026. But, in the overall scheme of things, these teams are like the City of New Orleans, bound to be 500 miles from their destination when the day is done. But, at least for a week... the Wildcats can shout from the steps of the nearest train depot, that they pulled off an A.W. in Week 8 in the BDFL.  

Train Whistle “Sounds Defeat” for the ‘Dillos:

Out of Duncanville, Texas, runs the ATSF – the Atchison, Topeka, & Santa Fe Railway. It’s mostly a forgotten freight train running at low speed (like the Armadillos). Meanwhile, the most impressive historical “train” running out of Texas would have to be “Night Train Lane.” That’s former Rams, Cardinals, and Lions defensive back Richard Lane, who played 14-years in the NFL in the 1950s and 1960s. The Bulletin’s brief “Tribute to Texas,” comes “off the tracks,” when the BDFL’s Duncanville Armadillos are mentioned. In Week 8 in fantasy football, the ‘Dillos barely put up a fight against the Fairfield PowerSleds. The “Mean Machine” was churning and burning this past weekend. The Sleds were like a runaway freight train against K.P. & Company. It was ugly at times – ugly early – as locomotive PowerSleds over-powered the ‘Dillos on both sides of the line of scrimmage. The Sleds might be from the “other side of the tracks,” but they mean business in the cyber world of the BDFL. Look out! The Sleds might be building up steam.

Tied to the Tracks – Dogs Run Over by Freebirds:

With their franchise quarterback “tied to the tracks,” the Black Creek Freebirds look to be in trouble at the outset of their Week 8 contest against the Brookside Dogs. But, “Mark’s Mutts” are just flat out weak. Even without stellar QB – Josh Allen of the Buffalo Bills (???)– the Freebirds ran over the Dogs with a big, old-fashioned A.W., 45-15. “Jammin’ Jaimie” Hand cruised like an AmTrak going from Birmingham, to Tuscaloosa, to New Orleans. Old Bocephus heard that lonesome whistle and got fired up for this game, proving Black Crick doesn’t take a back seat to the Five Mile Creek. It is a fact, that Dog grew up on the on the wrong side of the tracks. On that side of the tracks – the wrong side – is where Mr. Mark Burr was raised. He’s comfortable there. He knows all the tricks there. He knows where the money and the empty Coke bottles are. And, he’s not afraid to use one as a weapon. But, Hime’s F’birds came to play and dodges the blunt-force trauma to the head, and the Brookside L&N train. The results are already in the hist’ry books... an embarrassing loss for the Dogs, and sweet Skynyrd celebration music for the Freebirds on their home field, “train roll on... on down the line... please take me far away.” Tuesday’s gone... and so are the Dogs.

Railroad Crossing Confuses Blitz:

The Nawf Birmingham Vulcans played host to the Druid City Blitz in Week 8 action in the BDFL. Both teams came into this pivotal crossroads game like Albert Reeves coming into the triple-set of tracks just north of 15th Street in Tuscaloosa. For those of you who weren’t there... Albert - in the famous White Grenada (but WITHOUT the Yellow Canoe tied on top), hit those side-by-side-by-side tracks so fast and hard, that all of his passengers hit their heads on the roof of the vehicle. It was quite a noise. Undaunted by the rattle... Albert calmly said, “that was fun. Let’s do it again.” So... Albert circled around and hit the tracks again just as fast and hard, although this time the passengers were able to “brace,” and not hit their heads on the roof. That Granada ran for years, and years more... although that night... it seemed like everything underneath it, fell off. Such was the shock and dismay of the “Gritz Blitz” upon learning that his team had been T-Boned by a train on the railroad tracks on Finley Avenue, near Legion Field. It has the “young, but naïve,” Nic Hand – who’s team started slow in 2026 – that pulled out a vict’ry 43-31 this past weekend in the BDFL.

The Bulletin Express:

And, that brings the Bulletin Express into the depot for the end of yet another week’s BDFL game summaries and recaps and onto some of the most famous lines / lyrics involving trains of all shapes and sizes.  

Train lines/lyrics from Rock, Country, and Folk:

And, the train conductor said, take a break Driver 8…

Gonna take a freight train, down at the station, don’t care where it goes…

Train I ride…16 coaches long.

Train, train… take me on out of this town

Train roll on, on down the line, won't you please take me far away…

I hear the train a comin’… It’s that orange blossom special…

Let the midnight special…

Busted flat in Baton Rouge, waitin’ for a train…

Till the train runs out of track…

Virgil Caine is my name, and I served on the Danville train…

Take the last train to Clarksville, and I’ll meet you at the station…

When love comes to town, I’m gonna catch that train…

I grew up just west of the tracks, holding me to hold me back.

Well the Illinois Central, & the Southern Central Freight, got to keep on pushin' mama, You know they're running late

In the shuffling madness… Of the locomotive breath…Runs the all-time loser, Headlong to his death…

She got runned over by a damned old train.

Rock me momma like a south bound train… hey, momma rock me…

I’m the train they call the City of New Orleans, and I’ll be gone 500 miles when the day is done.

…climbed aboard the Dream Weaver train

And I feel like I'm a rider on a downbound train… (Boss)

On a warm summer's eve… on a train bound for nowhere…

He’s leaving on that midnight train to Georgia…

Ride on the Peace Train…

Train kept a-rolling all night long…Train kept a-rolling all night long…

Hey, Porter, Hey Porter, would you tell me the time? How much longer will it be, 'til we cross that Mason Dixon Line?

Steel rails, chase the sunshine around the bend…

Wouldn't you know we're riding on the Marrakesh Express. They're taking me to Marrakesh, All aboard the train...

Pennsylvania 65-thousand… Pennsylvania 6, 5, oh, oh, oh,

Pardon me boys, is that the Chattanooga Choo Choo?

I’ve been working on the railroad, all the live long day…

Gonna hang around the tracks ‘til the mail train comes back, and roll in my sweet baby’s arms.

I’m going off the rails on a crazy train...

Now listen to the jingle, the rumble, and the roar… as she dashes thro' the woodland, and speeds along the shore

Cling to the Father and his holy name… and, don't go riding on that long Black Train.

Any rebroadcast, or retransmission, or pictures, descriptions, or accounts of this event, without the express, written consent of The Commissioner of the BDFL, Iron Hand, is strictly prohibited.