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Just One Winless Team Remains (Of course, it’s the Slovaks)
Blitz Bury Bishops, 33-3:
We
have a new term, saying, phrase in the BDFL and it is attributed to
the newest franchise - the Mt. High Blue Deacons - coached by
Anthony Bishop. When you “pull a Bishop,” that means you score in
single digits. The first year franchise has done it so much this
season that the BULLETIN felt it was appropriate to name something
after them. So, congratulations to the Blue Deacons, who will long
be remembered now in BDFL lore. The Bumbling Boys from Blount County
“pulled a Bishop” in Week Six, scoring only 3-points, and absorbing
an A.W. at the hands of the Druid City Blitz. One week after
suffering their first loss of the season (to the Benton Bullets),
the Fritz Blitz came back with a vengeance against the Blue Deacons,
winning going away, 33-3. Not only did the Deacons “pull a Bishop,”
but they also captured yet another “Toilet Seat Team of the Weak,”
for their paltry performance this weekend.
Brookside Dogs Maul Tree Dwellers:
Mark
Burr’s 19-year-losing streak officially has a chance in hell of
ending in 2014. The Brookside Dogs actually showed some “signs of
life,” and “showed some bite,” this past Sunday when they visited
Silver Lakes and completely demolished the Sloth Monsters, 54-37.
Mark’s Mutts flat out came to play, and dropped the Three Toed Tree
Dwellers right off the limbs they were clinging to without any
plausible thumbs to think of. Dog put off his celebration until this
weekend (more specifically Saturday) when he will host any BDFL
owners that want to drop by the Quad – Tent #36 – near Joe Namath’s
signature at the foot of Denny Chimes. No word yet on whether white,
chalky, meat will be available… but Jacob, Samuel, Jackson, and
Matthew are looking forward to it.
One Point Win – Woo Crew Edges Mayors:
A
couple of “one-point wins” are up next on the agenda, or itinerary
for the BULLETIN, here in a recap of Week Six. In the Hayden
Hayfields on Sunday afternoon, the Smoke Rise Woosiers barely
escaped with their dignity (too late) by edging the Magic City
Mayors, 19-18. The Woo Crew was so thrilled with the vict’ry that
they invited the Cronies to stick around for a Pumpkin Pie Parade.
However, the Mayors were in no mood to hang around, especially since
they are scared of Halloween, and most of the trappings that go with
it.
One Point Win – Woodies Nip Slovaks:
“They actually have a pretty good team,” said Kawliga on Saturday
Night between fits of throwing his hat and eating Pasqualle’s Pizza
during the Alabama-Arkansas game. He was talking about the Fighting
Slovaks… so, he may have had “one too many” at that point. On
Sunday, his poor-mouthing almost came true as the Black Creek Wooden
Warriors couldn’t run the ball, couldn’t hold on to the ball, and
couldn’t really block a soul, yet still managed to come away with a
one-point vict’ry over the woebegone Oak Mountain Fighting Slovaks.
ASlo’s team is now 0-6, and the only “winless” team in the BDFL. The
EuroTrash Talkers have been completely silenced this season.
Meanwhile, the Woodies were singing the Bocephus version of Kawliga
late Sunday night. All the BULLETIN heard was, “standing there,
don’t ever show a sign, because his heart was made of knotty pine.”
Two Point Game – PowerSleds Escape Grenadiers, 28-26:
Mad
Jack bided his time. The Fairfield Power Sleds waited their turn.
Big John, Bufu, and the rest of the “cast of characters” in
Fairfield had this game circled ever since the Progressive Priority
Draft turned against them in late August. The Sledheads came out in
full force to support their team on Sunday afternoon, as the Mean
Machine had its first chance to enact a measure of revenge against
the guards (er Grenadiers, Commissioner… whatever). And, Paul
“Wrecking” Crew & Company did not disappoint the home crowd. Down by
four points in the closing moments, the Mean Machine scored from
one-yard out (the Longest Yard) to defeat Iron Hand and his Greedy
Grenadiers, 28-26. “Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em,” said Mad as his team
celebrated the two-point vict’ry.
Wildcats Whip Wizards:
Old
Merlin (Gus) felt good about his chances in Western Hills (Starkvegas).
But, when the Wizards (LCCC) arrived at Fair Park (Scott Field at
Davis Wade Stadium) they were greeted rudely by the home team. The
Wildcats (Bulldogs) completely destroyed the Pixie Dusters (War
Eagles) in a game that wasn’t as close as the final score would
indicate. The BioCats celebrated at the local Dairy Queen since
there is no Waffle House in town. The BULLETIN is quite sure the
Wizards were there too, and for the same reasons.
Gamblers Strike It Rich vs. Cheetahs:
It’s
been a rough stretch of games lately for the Dixie Mafia, but they
pulled out a big win on the road in Week Six against the Riverchase
Cheetahs, 28-22. The Sin Wagon has NOT been rolling on all cylinders
in 2014, and this past weekend was a prime example for Butch Neal’s
felines. Never a juggernaut away from the Gulf Coast (at least in
recent memory) the Gamblers will take this road vict’ry and savor
the spoils of war for at least a week in the BDFL as the season
approaches the midpoint.
Bullets Fall to Visting Armadillos, 34-24:
“I’m
extremely grateful to the Duncanville Armadillos and their
management for getting me regular price tickets to the LSU (21-0)
game in New Orleans, a couple of years ago, along with reservations
and transportation,” said Bullet. “So, it’s hard for me to treat ‘em
bad, because I feel such a debt to K.P. and company.” So, that can
partially explain why the Armadillos beat the Bullets in Week Six,
34-24. (What about Burr getting you tickets at full regular price
for the Notre Dame (42-14) game in Miami? “Well, it’s hard to NOT
beat the Dogs,” said a very, very grateful Bullerino.) |
